Pump it!

This week the girls will be put on their insulin pumps.

Breathe.

I haven't really been blogging much lately but thought I better write something, do something to document this for myself. And perhaps for someone else out there who may one day unfortunately be in the same situation.

Pumps are very expensive. VERY. But we were lucky enough to get ours before our benefits ran out from Jason's previous job. I believe that company was Maritime Life, which had awesome coverage. Some companies will not cover the cost of a pump, only their supplies. We got two Medtronic pumps and what should have costs us $13,200, only costs us $400. Again, very lucky. Pumps usually last approximately 5 years. So next time, I hope we are so lucky again.

We've been waiting for the right time to put the girls on. Or should I say the right financial time. My oldest daughter Jules, has been wanting a pump for a long time now. And finally the right time seemed upon us. Then we got word that Jason was yet again getting laid off his job. This time, however, they assure us it is not permanent, but only for a few weeks. To make a much longer story shorter, we've decided to go ahead and do it. Jules has waited long enough. Plus we are putting Abby on one as well. They will go through it together.

They are both very excited to be going to spend the night in the hospital. But have also confessed to be a little scared about the pump. Frankly so am I. It is quite the mixed bag of emotions. Now that the moment we wished for, prayed for, is finally upon us...I find myself hesitant. Not so sure anymore. Scared.

We have found ourselves a new normal, a routine, with the insulin pens. It's not such a big deal anymore. There are many days we do it without any much thought at all. I don't feel so controlled by it anymore. But now, with a pump, it's a whole new learning curve. It's like starting over. Bye bye comfort zone. Hello change. And change is something I've had just about enough of....thank you very much.

Right now when you see the girls, if you didn't know, you couldn't tell they were diabetic. Not unless you saw them getting their sugar checked or witnessed them getting insulin. Other than a medic-alert bracelet, there is no mark or stamp on their person that screams "we have diabetes!". But with a pump, it is different.

A tiny needle will be inserted into the skin of their belly. This needle is attached to this little plastic thing. The insulin pump has a tube that clips into the plastic thing and that is how insulin will travel into their body. I compare it to a seat belt. At any time, like swimming or taking a bath, we can simply unclip the pump, wait, and when they're done, clip in back on. For some reason, however, it seems to bother me that during this time, like bathtime, when I am playing with Abby in the tub, or when Jules is running around the sprinkler in her bikini, etc... they will have this little plastic circle taped on their belly. A physical reminder of their condition.....as if I could ever forget. Like I said, a mixed bag of emotions.

So why do it then? Because it will give them better control. Free up their schedule. If on vacation, we happen upon an ice cream stand and it is not meal time, then maybe they could have a cone. Unlike now. If they want to sleep in and skip breakfast, they can. Unlike now. If they run high in the night and require some extra insulin, I can just press a few buttons and not have to wake them for a needle. Unlike now.

A pump is the best possible treatment for a type one diabetic and I want that for my girls. So wat if it's new? So what if I'm scared? So what if it means more change? We will get through. Just like we did when they were diagnosed three weeks apart. And before long we should have our new normal back. A routine again.

Breathe.

Here we go.