Summer Sequel

As I've mentioned before, we are planning on putting Jason's old car in the Canada Day Parade. Yesterday morning, I had a genius idea. Since we're going to be driving through the community very slowly while everyone looks on....what better opportunity to thank said community for their support? Kinda make it into a Team Keenan float, if you will.

I bought some white Bristol board to make signs. Haven't quite decided how to word it yet, but it will be something along the lines of "Team Keenan thanks you for supporting us in the Walk for the Cure". We're all going to wear our JDRF t-shirts and we've already purchased a flag kit for the car. I also bought some sticky-back magnet strips for attaching the signs to the car, so as not to hurt the paint. Very important you know. :)

I told the kids and Jules got very excited. All of this has been very beneficial to her, I think. The story in the paper, the support at the yard sale, participating in the Walk.....it has shown her that people out there really do care. I've never been one to enjoy the limelight...or the spot light...or anything that would draw attention to myself. LOL. But all of that goes out the window when it comes to this. I would never want my little hang ups get in the way. I guess that's just one of the many blessings that has come out of all this....helping me to let go of some of my issues.

Good news! Samuel has decided to join us after all. Of course, only after we promised him candy. LOL. It's all about the food for him, you know. We're still planning on going camping Friday and Saturday night. So far the weather is looking alright. I hope it holds out.

Yesterday Jason and I had the rare opportunity of being in town without the kids. So we grabbed some Dixie Lee Chicken(hadn't eaten there in ages!) and headed over to the Richie Wharf and ate it outside by the water. Lovely! Sitting there under the pagoda(as God is my witness I WILL have one someday!) with the breeze blowing, I was reminded of the island. Oh, how I want to go back there someday! It felt so like Summer. I commented to Jason that it felt like July. You know how July has a feeling? And then, of course, I was reminded of last July.

The last time we were at the Richie Wharf was two days before Jules' diagnosis. Jason's brother was home visiting from Ontario. We had just received our official floor plan of our new house. Life was grand. My stomach turned a little. It's like my reflex is to start mourning all over again. And then I have to remind myself that she's ok. Abby's ok. We're ok. All of this happens in my mind, in the time span of 3 seconds. Then more enjoying the sun, and the breeze and quality time with my husband. Then I spot a tour boat sailing into view. I'm reminded again of that fateful day when Jason's parents and brother and his family took a tour of the river while we waited for them to return. Stomach turns......mourning......we're ok.

I think this will happen a lot to me, and with greater frequency, until the anniversary comes and goes. Last Summer seemed like it was stolen from us. It's like Christmas. You look so forward to it, counting down the days til it's arrival and then it finally comes......and it sucks! You're shocked. You want a do-over. You can't believe you have to wait a whole year til it comes again. This Summer is like our "do-over". We've gone through the ups of downs, trials and tribulations of a whole year with Diabetes, and now we've been rewarded with Summer's arrival. And we're fine. No, better than fine. We're strong.

And life is grand.

Gratitude

One night last week I was rummaging around in my night stand and discovered my old gratitude journal. I had not written in it(or any journal for that matter) in a very long time. Too long. I began to read. You know how they say that you don't know what you've got until it's gone? Well I now know that I always knew......I always knew how blessed I was. And that was good to know.

Previously I would write five things that I was grateful for that day. I'm sure some people would think that I might find it hard to be grateful, considering the year we've had. But I say I have even more blessings than ever before. So now, every night, instead of just writing five things, I write ten. It's become my favorite part of bed time. To put pen to paper and reflect on all my good fortune. What better way to end the day?


To educate yourself for the feeling of gratitude means to take nothing for granted, but to always seek out and value the kind that will stand behind the action. Nothing that is done for you is a matter of course. Everything originates in a will for the good, which is directed at you. Train yourself never to put off the word or action for the expression of gratitude. ~ Albert Schweitzer

Let us rise up and be thankful, for if we didn't learn a lot today, at least we learned a little, and if we didn't learn a little, at least we didn't get sick, and if we got sick, at least we didn't die; so, let us all be thankful. ~ Buddha

Don't pray when it rains if you don't pray when the sun shines. ~ Leroy Satchel Paige

Night Shift

One of the only benefits to Jason working nights this week is that I will not have to get up at 3am to check the girls' sugars. I've had to get up Sunday thru Saturday. I getting a wee bit played out. Last night I didn't get up until well after 4am, and then it seems so hard to get back to sleep again. The joys of diabetes.

Another plus to the night shift is that it gives Jason a four day weekend. Woo-hoo! He'll sleep in Friday until 11am or so and then he's not required to work until Tuesday morning. We were thinking of going camping but are torn, considering all the Canada day festivities. We could leave at dinner time on Friday, and come home early Sunday morning, so that we wouldn't miss the parade and annual party at my Aunt's house. But this would mean we would miss the fireworks on Saturday night. Hmmm. We're supposed to gather at Kel's house for the Rock n' Roll fireworks the next week. So maybe the kids wouldn't mind. I guess it will all depend on the weather.

We're planning on being in the parade this year, with all of us in Jason's old car. I figure we might as well, considering we found ourselves in the parade last year. LOL(see archives). Samuel is not at all interested in participating. He would much rather be catching candy then throwing it. Go figure.

The whole family spent the day in town yesterday. Had a detour with Jules at the hospital. Nothing serious, she's fine. I bought Dad his late Father's Day gift, and got myself an Adirondack chair. It's wooden, unstained and lovely! I plan to stain it yellow, so it will stand out on my porch. I still need to finish staining the porch itself but the rain won't let up. I hope to have the white part all done by Canada day.

We ran into a couple we know in Walmart. They pulled us aside to ask us questions about our new house; if we liked it, etc... They also said they had heard how beautiful our house was inside. Wow! It was so bizarre to be on the other end of that conversation. Don't know if I'll ever get used to it.

Schools Out For Summer....Well Almost

Today is the last day that Abby and I will be waiting and watching for the kids to come home from school and get off the bus. Yes there is still school tomorrow, but Abby has a full day of preschool while Jules and Samuel only have a half day. So this is it. Next year it will be just me waiting for the three of them to come home. Very weird and somewhat sad. I'd like to think that I'm not as neurotic as I was when Jules and Samuel started kindergarten....but only Summer will tell. It's hard not to get sad when you know how fast they are growing up.

I am really looking forward to Summer this year, perhaps more than I ever have. Which is strange, considering this is the first year in a long time that Jason has no vacation and we have no plans to travel anywhere. No PEI. No Fundy. We'll be very lucky if we go camping in Moncton. Even luckier to go camping more than twice. Money is beyond tight right now. But still the excitement contentment for Summer is there.

As anyone who has not been living under a rock already knows, we had a hard Summer last year. Very hard. And it had nothing to do with the fact that we weren't going anywhere on vacation. This year the expectations are not as high as previous years. While other Summers were filled with planning trips and scheduled fun family time, this year the only expectation or hope can be described in one word. Calm.

This year I will drink in every minute of this Summer and be grateful for the calmness. The lack of excitement. We had enough excitement last year, thank you.

Super Freak

Got some great news last night. My brother is engaged! Yes I know that they've only been together for five months, but I think this is such a good thing! She is very nice and really seems to care for Lee and he for her. It's great that I don't have to worry about him being alone anymore. I think this is really a 'til death' relationship. They're definitely in it for the long haul. Jules was very excited when I told her, visions of dresses dancing in her head. lol. But she'll have to wait a year or maybe two for the blessed event, since there is no date set as of yet.




In other news, Jason and I drove down to Moncton last Friday evening to retrieve "Do-your-best-Bear", better known to us as "the little bugger". lol. He had been left behind at the motel and was deeply missed by all. Seriously. It was quite dramatic when we realized he was missing. Did wonders for my "Mother guilt". I had phoned the motel Sunday night and was told that he was nowhere to be found. A cousin who went to Moncton on Monday, dropped in and checked for us. Still no bear. So what was a parent to do? Samuel decided if he couldn't have the original he would settle for a duplicate, so onto to the Internet we went, searching for "the little bugger". Turns out that he is a collector's item. Seriously. The only place I could find him where they would ship to Canada was on eBay. So, there we were bidding on a care bear on eBay like those freaks who collect such things, just to have them sit on a shelf or in a glass case. (No offense if you happen to be one).





Late Monday night, the phone rings. It is the motel. They found the bear! Oh joy! Thank you God! I can't wait to tell Samuel in the morning! .........Then it hits me. The auction! As anyone who has ever bid on eBay knows, any bid you make is considered a legally binding contract. You are not allowed to retract it. And since we were so anxious to comfort Samuel, our maximum bid was pretty hefty, ......well, hefty for a teddy bear anyway. So of course we won the auction. (Crap!) I mean, not even the freaks would outbid us! So who is the freak now? lol.



And so it is that right now, somewhere in Utah, another "little bugger" is planning a trip.

Oh well, now we have a spare. :)

Little Wonders

Rob Thomas says it best...

Let it go
Let it roll right off your shoulder
Don't you know, the hardest part is over
Let it in
Let your clarity define you
In the end
We will only just remember how it feels

Our lives are made in these small hours
These little wonders
These twists and turns of fate
Time falls away
But these small hours
These small hours still remain

Let it slide
Let your troubles fall behind you
Let it shine
Until you feel it all around you
And i don't mind
If it's me you need to turn to
We'll get by
It's the heart that really matters in the end

Our lives are made
In these small hours
These little wonders
These twists and turns of fate
Time falls away
But these small hours
These small hours still remain

All of my regret will wash away some how
But i can not forget
The way i feel right now

In these small hours
These little wonders
These twists and turns of fate
Time falls away
But these small hours
These small hours still remain

Walking On Sunshine

Saturday morning we packed up the family and headed for Moncton. This was the weekend of the walk. We arrived around noon and checked into our motel room. We stayed in the same place as we did when we were down buying the van. It's perfect for us because it has a full kitchen, that way we can bring some of our own food to supplement cost. It also has two double beds and a fold out couch, which we needed since my mother was staying with us. The biggest selling feature of course is the heated indoor pool. The kids couldn't wait to go swimming. All of this for $95 plus tax! Hard to beat that!

We had a quick lunch with the rest of our group(their room wasn't ready) and then we took the kids shopping. Abby was very excited because we were also celebrating her birthday. The stores were mostly crowded, almost annoyingly so. It was hard to keep track of the kids. They were always running off with Mom, Kel or Sher. In the dollar store, I searched for something that all of us could wear to unite our team at the walk. I really would have like to have ball caps, but since it was the dollar store, this was hard to find. We opted instead for pink visors. Pink, of course, because we were representing such girly girls. lol. Maybe we should have done crowns?

After shopping, we ran into DQ and bought Abby her ice cream cake that we promised her. Then it was time for her "party". Everyone gathered in our motel room where we ate take-out, ice cream cake and watched Abby open her presents. She really enjoyed herself. I'm glad that she got to have a special birthday. Samuel is now asking if he can have his next birthday party in Moncton. Ummmm, no! lol. Then it was time to go into the pool. Jason had bought the kids these long plastic water shooters.....not a good idea. I might "accidentally" leave those home next time. It was great to be in the water again. First swim of the season! Later in the evening, we did our usual trek to Value Village. We always seem to go there whenever we are in the city. It might sound sad, but this is how I get clothes. This trip I snatched three pairs of jeans, one pair of shorts and a tee. Not too shabby.

The next morning the sky was blue and the sun was shining. We all ate breakfast together in the motel's little diner. Not feeling like eating the usual fare, I choose the Belgian waffle with strawberries and cream. Heaven! I couldn't finish all of it, it was so big. Then it was time to pack up, check out and don our visors!

JDRF's Walk for the Cure was located in Riverfront Park in downtown Moncton. In other words it's in behind Main Street, along the Petticodiac River. In regards to the walk, I must start by saying that it was one of the most organized events I've ever been to. Awesome! Since we were early, we snagged a picnic table and managed to keep it throughout the entire time. I led my team over to where we submit our pledges. When they saw how much we raised, they gave us a round of applause. Very nice. They also gave me a walk t-shirt, a nice bag and an ipod shuffle! Very nice indeed! My teammates also got a t-shirt, but no ipod. :( An ipod was the incentive prize for any walker who personally earned more than $1000, and since our yardsale profits were on my pledgesheet.....I got the ipod. Oh well, there's always next year girls. lol.

Scattered around the park were activities for kids. There was a jumping castle, some sort of blow-up tunnel castle, an arts and crafts table and the most amazing face painting.

There was also a very efficient BBQ area(no lines!), a snack stand, and coolers everywhere filled with ice cold water, juice and pop. Everything was free! Maybe the best part was the band Cat Sass - freaking awesome! I mean every single song was good. Their music really helped pump everyone up. A hockey player(#26) from the Moncton Wildcats and it's furry mascot were also there getting their pics taken with kids and signing t-shirts.

He signed my shirt, which would probably be more cool if I knew who he was. lol. Abby was not at all impressed with the mascot. She's not that into large fuzzy strangers trying to hug her. Go figure.

At 1:45pm, the band announced that it was picture time and could all the kids with diabetes please come up to the front of the stage to get their picture taken together. My girls were pretty well in the center, with fellow diabetic kids on either side. Just as the kids were finally all situated and smiling for pics, the band starts playing You and Me by Lifehouse. "What day is it.....". They were not 3 notes in and I was crying. I will never be able to hear it again without crying and seeing this image in my head.

Just after this pic was shot, two babies were seated on the right hand side. They were no more than 7-8 months old. It made me cry even harder to know that they too had this disease.

A few sleeve wipes later (I forgot kleenex) and after a very interesting trip with the kids to the port-a-potty, it was time to start the actual walk. We all lined up at the Start sign. Much to my Mom's chagrin, a bagpipe player started to play. And then we were off! The walk did not seem to take too long, 35-45 mins I would say. To Samuel, it was an eternity. lol. Jason carried Abby a lot of the time. Halfway through they had a stand set up with water bottles, where we took a rest so we could check the girls sugars. Then it was time for the home stretch.

This whole experience has helped me in ways I couldn't even imagine. I would recommend it to anyone who has gone through the same situation. I can not begin to describe my emotions as my family neared the finish line. Jason, the kids and I all held hands and stepped across. It was like that finish line represented so much more than just a 5k walk. It was that together, as a family, we had been to hell and back and yet we were not beaten. In fact we were stronger than ever. A moment I will never forget.